Same demons! Those have been following me ever since I can remember: I seem to write about them and their influence on me over and over again. They seem to be the only consistent thing throughout the years. Me, fighting against them, they enjoy their toll on me, then we hug and laugh about how miserable we are and how in a very twisted way we only have each other. I hate them most of the time but they’re just doing their work, how can I judge them? They excel in what they do, all that they produce in me makes me who I am. We’re a dysfunctional couple but we are together anyway. I double-think my feelings they are the only powerful words and I get carried out for what I think I should feel when they are around. I feel everything and then nothing, I don’t know if I block it or it just happens. When everything seems a little obscure and boring I find drama appealing and refreshing, just a way to be reborn.
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I’m carrying them on my back, they’re heavy but I’m used to their weight, it still hasn’t changed it’s same since the beginning. The Ds make me walk, think and move more slowly, somehow I know they’ll always be there which is not a negative thing at all who would I’d be without them?. I feel them on my chest, crawling up and down, kicking from time to time. I can tell they’re not evil, not all the time, the name demon is deceiving I believe that name is just like any other name, they’re just doing what they’re supposed to, they’re faithful to their nature, and I respect that I wish I could be as faithful as they are to my human nature. They talk to me, Ds are nice, they only want the best for me even if they have to get me through the worst. When I lose I win.
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I’m here once again, mania is here too. I can’t get rid of it. It’s like an explosion of butterflies, the same you feel when you're in love but battling each other with swords. Every time I breath they are there, I feel my heart beats a little harder too. I feel like a glass overflowing with water. I can’t contain myself. It’s so much excitement together, I need to get it out. I feel so much that I want to cry but it’s not sadness it is just emotion, energy coming out of me. Pure desperation. You don’t feel comfortable anywhere, you want it to explode. Being too much time alone it’s getting to me.
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I’m carrying them on my back, they’re heavy but I’m used to their weight, it still hasn’t changed it’s same since the beginning. The Ds make me walk, think and move more slowly, somehow I know they’ll always be there which is not a negative thing at all who would I’d be without them?. I feel them on my chest, crawling up and down, kicking from time to time. I can tell they’re not evil, not all the time, the name demon is deceiving I believe that name is just like any other name, they’re just doing what they’re supposed to, they’re faithful to their nature, and I respect that I wish I could be as faithful as they are to my human nature. They talk to me, Ds are nice, they only want the best for me even if they have to get me through the worst. When I lose I win.
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I’m here once again, mania is here too. I can’t get rid of it. It’s like an explosion of butterflies, the same you feel when you're in love but battling each other with swords. Every time I breath they are there, I feel my heart beats a little harder too. I feel like a glass overflowing with water. I can’t contain myself. It’s so much excitement together, I need to get it out. I feel so much that I want to cry but it’s not sadness it is just emotion, energy coming out of me. Pure desperation. You don’t feel comfortable anywhere, you want it to explode. Being too much time alone it’s getting to me.
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